I’ve always felt that need for expressing myself. And when I was a kid I didn’t know the reason why. I would tell people it’s simply because I love creating and expressing and making things. For the process and product itself. For the ”art” itself. Wasn’t until I started photographing full-time did I realize it’s not just pure ”I love to”. It’s because I feel too much, to opposed, to strongly expressed though my whole being, sometimes even physically. I knew I was overwhelmed all the time and I need an exhaustion point when I would start to cry of happiness or/and sadness over some song I would hear on the radio. Through every process of making something I would let go of all the emotions that are bubbling up inside me and I need to deal with on daily basis. My life is really beautiful and there are sometimes no problems at all, but when you’re an emotional sponge like me, everything becomes a subject of feeling too deeply. My first way of expressing was writing and just like today, I would take my notebooks everywhere with me, in case of idea, a pretty quote or the need to spill out my soul. For a time I stopped doing everything, writing, photographing, making some diy projects out of material collected in the nature just because I didn’t get into the Academy. I thought that other people are entitled to say ”Your work is shit.” just because they finished an art college. Now I know for a fact that they can say it all they want, it doesn’t mean it’s true. That year and a half were few of the most painful months in my life. Without an exit point I became overwhelmed with everything. I felt like I could burst into tears every second when something even slightly bad happens because it’s just an add to the already boiled up emotions inside. When I photograph I am free and no longer on the edge of opposed emotions.

As an artist, creator, maker, you go through processes and phases in your creative life. And every new obstacle you need to overcome is an obstacle inside you that exists there for a reason. Reason is always the same, to push the boundaries. For yourself, for a cause or a point of view you stand for, for your creative flow and for life itself. But don’t do it for the wrong reasons, to hurt, provoke or piss somebody off. If the reason for your art is other people, you’re doing it wrong. We are all entitled to share our expressions with the world but even if we don’t, I believe it doesn’t matter. You made something damn it! It came from your own two hands and it belongs only to you, what you’re gonna do with it depends only on the obligation towards yourself. So whatever you feel like you should do with it, just listen to your gut. Hold the vision, trust the process and express for yourself. To heal your soul. Sea of love, S.

 

 

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